Earthquake

Its just about midnight. And I wake up for some unknown reason. Just in time to see my wardrobe doors all open simultaneously. Its more than a bit creepy. I become convinced someone is in the house. I go downstairs & check all the rooms. In my paranoia I check the garden & then actually lock my doors. Finally, I decide it’s a full bladder that’s disturbed me, use the facilities and return to bed.

This morning I learn its an earthquake. A massive 5.1 on the Richter scale, centred in Market Rasin, with Telford, or at least my wardrobes, rocked by aftershocks. Ok, so its fortunately not the tens of thousands dead in Pakistan type earthquake. Never the less, the earth gods are angry and must be appeased. But where the hell do you find a virgin in Telford?