Man's gotta have a hobby

Today I got accused of being an alcoholic. No, No, No. I'm a drunk. The difference is huge. An alcoholic drinks because they have to, a drunk drinks because they want to. I have very strict rules. No spirits. No alcohol before midday (unless there's rugby on). No drinking at home alone. I can actually go for long periods of time without a drink, provided I'm not bored. At the end of the day I enjoy sitting in a pub drinking a lot of weak beer. I'm good at it. Mans gotta have a hobby.
Some years ago I used to smoke. Every time I had a medical it was do you smoke - yes. gonna kill you. So I gave up. Now apparently, I drink to much, my colesterol is to high, I drink too much, I go out in the sun too often, don't exercise enough, blah blah blah. Not one "Well done for giving up the ciggies", just a whole lot of new things that are killing me. Not once was there a "your gonna live longer", just a whole new list of reasons to be depressed. I have no doubt that if I ate heathily, stopped going out in daylight and worked out I would live long enough to find that being to close to streetlights gives you cancer. There are people who just don't want you to be happy.