There is no end of amazing stuff out there.
On the bad side, global warming will lead to an increase in bubonic plague. On the good side banning CFCs appears to have been a good idea and the hole in the ozone layer is not getting worse.
After much debate scientists have agreed on a formal definition of a planet. So, if its more or less spherical, orbits a star and is not itself a star it’s a planet. Yup, they need a major conference of academics to decide that those big round lumps that whiz around the sun are planets. They could have just asked a twelve year old. This means that jolly old Pluto is still a planet. Although it is a new class of planet known as, wait for it, a pluton. Our old friend Xena (2003 UB313) is also a pluton type planet. Strangely, Pluto’s moon Charon turns out not to be a moon, since it does not orbit Pluto, but rather it & Pluto orbit each other. So Charon is a pluton planet as well. And finally the asteroid Ceres, which was a planet when it was discovered in 1801, but stopped being a planet in the 19th century is now a planet again. But its still an asteroid as well. So although there has been no noticeable change in our solar system it now has 12 planets rather than 9. That’s cleared that up then.
The space boys have also got proof that there is dark matter out there. Its all to do with colliding galaxies maintaining most of their mass whilst losing their gas due to inertia. Its why you don’t lose weight when you fart. Maybe.
But best of all, a man in Poland who lost his tongue to cancer has had a new one created from his buttocks. Let me make it clear that if I should ever be unfortunate enough to need a new tongue I would like it made from Charlotte Church’s left butt cheek. Mmmmm.
After much debate scientists have agreed on a formal definition of a planet. So, if its more or less spherical, orbits a star and is not itself a star it’s a planet. Yup, they need a major conference of academics to decide that those big round lumps that whiz around the sun are planets. They could have just asked a twelve year old. This means that jolly old Pluto is still a planet. Although it is a new class of planet known as, wait for it, a pluton. Our old friend Xena (2003 UB313) is also a pluton type planet. Strangely, Pluto’s moon Charon turns out not to be a moon, since it does not orbit Pluto, but rather it & Pluto orbit each other. So Charon is a pluton planet as well. And finally the asteroid Ceres, which was a planet when it was discovered in 1801, but stopped being a planet in the 19th century is now a planet again. But its still an asteroid as well. So although there has been no noticeable change in our solar system it now has 12 planets rather than 9. That’s cleared that up then.
The space boys have also got proof that there is dark matter out there. Its all to do with colliding galaxies maintaining most of their mass whilst losing their gas due to inertia. Its why you don’t lose weight when you fart. Maybe.
But best of all, a man in Poland who lost his tongue to cancer has had a new one created from his buttocks. Let me make it clear that if I should ever be unfortunate enough to need a new tongue I would like it made from Charlotte Church’s left butt cheek. Mmmmm.
posted by Old Man Rich at 2:31 PM
4 Comments:
No Doubt he talks arse then , much like you
ahhahahahaha........and walter.....hahahahaaaahaaaaaaaaa...sorry, I seem to be filling your comment spaces with haha`s
Oh, I was suffering from the delusion that I did lose weight when I repeated. Thank you.
not kylies? shame on you. x
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