Left a good job in the city
Spent the weekend with Monkey, Austin, Fuller, Gray & Nick the hat canoeing down the river Wye. It didn’t get off to a good start. We put the idiots all in the same car. So Nick, Gray & I used a map & arrived at Hay on Wye on time. The cretins bogged up using sat nav & arrived an hour late. Finally we were off. Chin & I had a few early steering problems. We did seem to zig zag from one bank to another & spent a lot of time going backwards. Also, for some strange reason our canoe was somewhat lower in the water than the others & we kept grounding. Still, I felt the laughter and cries of ‘you fat B*****’ from the other members of the party were unnecessary.
After five miles we paused at a pub. With hindsight this was an error. The Chin tipped our canoe over trying to get back in. Fortunately I was still ashore. A few miles down stream and Nick & Gray tipped at speed. Oh how we laughed as we frantically collected beer tins before they floated off. Then we came to an evil bend, desperately trying to avoid being swept under a tree we ground our canoe on the rocks. It tipped. I put a foot out to stop it tipping. Fuller put his foot out & discovered that his end was still in deep water. In he went again. So Monkey and Austin came around the bend and laughed at us a lot. Until they were swept under the trees. Over they went. Monkey ended up hanging from a tree. Austin had a handful of sunken canoe and a handful of branch. The rescue operation took three-quarters of an hour & the boys were down to one paddle. After 18 miles we finally crawled into the camp site around 7pm. Knackered. There were fit girls in bikini’s and I was to tired to even look. We staggered off to the pub for some medicine.
Up early and on the water by 7. It was a lovely morning. I heard a cookoo for the first time and saw my first British kingfisher. The fish were jumping & the scenery was stunning. And we enjoyed watching monkey try to paddle with a plank. We arrived in Hereford in time to listen to England’s destruction by Australia in the rugby and sleep in the sun until our lifts arrive. It was a cracking weekend, but I’m feeling the pain this morning.
And yes, OMR was the only person not to end up in the water by mistake. See, not just a pretty face.
After five miles we paused at a pub. With hindsight this was an error. The Chin tipped our canoe over trying to get back in. Fortunately I was still ashore. A few miles down stream and Nick & Gray tipped at speed. Oh how we laughed as we frantically collected beer tins before they floated off. Then we came to an evil bend, desperately trying to avoid being swept under a tree we ground our canoe on the rocks. It tipped. I put a foot out to stop it tipping. Fuller put his foot out & discovered that his end was still in deep water. In he went again. So Monkey and Austin came around the bend and laughed at us a lot. Until they were swept under the trees. Over they went. Monkey ended up hanging from a tree. Austin had a handful of sunken canoe and a handful of branch. The rescue operation took three-quarters of an hour & the boys were down to one paddle. After 18 miles we finally crawled into the camp site around 7pm. Knackered. There were fit girls in bikini’s and I was to tired to even look. We staggered off to the pub for some medicine.
Up early and on the water by 7. It was a lovely morning. I heard a cookoo for the first time and saw my first British kingfisher. The fish were jumping & the scenery was stunning. And we enjoyed watching monkey try to paddle with a plank. We arrived in Hereford in time to listen to England’s destruction by Australia in the rugby and sleep in the sun until our lifts arrive. It was a cracking weekend, but I’m feeling the pain this morning.
And yes, OMR was the only person not to end up in the water by mistake. See, not just a pretty face.
posted by Old Man Rich at 9:59 AM
4 Comments:
Canoeing can be quite fun. Ahhh, memories of the Illinois River back up in Oklahoma--Why did I have to become a Texan again?
I could have died on that river, but OMR saved my life. "Hold on Monkey i'll save you..."
What you can't see onm those pics is what Rich actually looked like. I t was like being saved by a Columbian Drugs Baron.
sounds like a great time! As you discovered, Beer and boats do not mix well *L*
what an adventure
I'm glad, the canoes tipped, you save the essentials - the beer =)
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