Supermarkets...

I normally shop at the co-op. Ok, it’s a bit expensive, and the selection isn’t great, but I think you should support your local store. Besides, one of the girls on the checkouts has nice eyes & its conveniently close to the Crown. But sometimes I need a big supermarket. I used to shop at Sainsbury’s, but they changed the layout & made the aisle’s narrower. I couldn’t find anything and fighting past the double parked trolleys pissed me off, so I abandoned them. Then I started using ASDA. Its next to work, good quality, and cheap. But its full of poor people. Now, there’s nothing wrong with the poor per se, but I don’t want to shop with them. I mean, your queuing with people with nits. Yuck. So, its back to Sainsbury’s (I can’t afford Marks & Sparks and Tesco is just to common). And I must say, the standard of tottie is definitely higher than its competitors. The young moms are not your usual Telford 14 year old chavs, its actually quite pleasant viewing, but the aisle’s are to narrow, there are too many people, the queues are too long.
However, Old man Rich has a solution. You see, I work. I can only shop at lunchtimes, evenings and weekends. However, there are lots of people who don’t work. Old People. The unemployed. Students. Mothers. Teachers (for 12 weeks a year), Santa, Vicars, (1 day a week – idle tossers). So, ban the lazy job shy scum from our supermarkets during lunchtimes and evenings. Make them switch of the Columbo re-runs, get off their lazy arses and go shopping whilst us good, honest, decent tax payers are at work. Actually, lets ban fat people and ugly people too. And under 18’s. And over 50’s. And pushchairs, wheelchairs, walking frames and people who use trolly’s rather than baskets. And blokes. In fact, it should just be me and attractive girls. And they should have to shop naked. Come on you supermarkets, do you want my trade or what?