The girl from albrighton...

she say YES !

Rubber fun

I received a pile of paperwork trussed up with a giant elastic band, which I put in my pocket.
So later I am idly playing with said band. Like you do.
And I wrap it around my head a couple of times to get the comedy Quasimodo look.
Like you do.

At which point the lift doors open.
No promotion for me again this year.

decorating

So, with a view to moving the girlfriend/potential carer and child/demon into chez rich we're decorating the box room for Hannah.
First this means moving out the computer & sticking it downstairs. Ok. No problem. I do that & invest in a wireless set up. So I read the instructions (not very blokey I'm afraid) and, in order to install I need the computer connected to the modem. But the computer is downstairs & the modem is upstairs. That's why I need wireless you fools. So I'm without Internet. (blogging from work. naughty but its Sunday & once again I'm doing unpaid overtime so sod em)

But its Sunday, Deb is at work, Hannah is at Nannies & I have no porn. :-(

And the box room is now a fairly garish yellow rather than the tasteful magnolia of yesterday. Its vile in every way and I'm very pleased with it.
Because its not, despite all mums prompting, Pink. Result.

To Dave or not to Dave

So that nice multimillionaire Mr Cameron tells me I don't need money to raise a child. All you need is love. And, obviously, to make sure that nanny tells nursie to remove the silver spoon from babies mouth before feeding.

Still, I find myself agreeing with tax breaks for married couples. Obviously, anyone reasonable includes civil partnerships and living together as if you are married, as we're a secular state. But, it seems reasonable that if one of you is a full time domestic and/or parent and is being supported by your partner rather than claiming huge amounts of benefit then you could share your unused tax allowance with your partner.
And good ol' David is going to implement this.

Ahh, no. My mistake. Dave would 'like' to do this. (provided your actually married and not some hideous queers or disgusting hippy couple) But he isn't actually going to do it.

So, Gordon Brown would like to end world poverty, combat global warming, massively fund public services and make Britain a global economic powerhouse but can't actually do it.
Dave C would like a tax break for married couples but can't actually do it. Talk about aiming high...

As I walk down the hill I pass a huge poster of a heavily airbrushed David Cameron looking down with a strangely bland expression. And I have this huge desire to spray paint the words "This man is a complete F***witt" across it.
Remarkably, as I proceed back up the hill after several pints I do not forfill this desire. With age comes wisdom. Or possibly apathy.

Tolerance

Its the Saturday before Christmas.
So, its carol singers and mince pies at the crown.
Deb has spent hours making her mincemeat & baking. OMR knocks some mince pies up.
And , OMR takes first place in the mince pie competition. Deb is unplaced. Its fair to say Rich gloats.
And has a celebratory ale or two.
And a little girl from the local paper awards me with my master baker certificate. And I give her a kiss. Possibly a little more enthusiastically than she is entirely happy with. She looks a bit shocked. So I do it again. :-)

Of course, I make it up to Deb at Christmas - by leaving her at home whilst I go to Gambia with Dad & Anna.

You can keep your white christmas. 35 and sunny. Now thats festive.

Some people may wonder why Deb puts up with me. Its because I'm damned pretty.

hic

ok. very drunk on that last one.
(guess who's girlfriend works on sunday nights?)

erm

ok. I'm a bit drunk. Like George B was a bit of a C***.
Except I can sober up. Maybe.

I live in fear of a tory landslide. Accepted Geordon brown is not PM material. But he is world class financialy. US let leman go, world going into meltdown and GB says no, dont do this, do this. World folllows and, given history, saves a lot of arses. Brilliaint chancellor. Shite PM.

Gorden Brown? complete arse? Yes!
but better the devil you know...

Happy new decade

Hi all. Its been a while. But 2010, swear I'm gonna blog. At least once a week. Honest.
Well, we'll see.

So, Happy new decade one and all.

I'm afraid the blogs going to be a bit disjointed for a while, Talking about things that happened a while ago. Or haven't happened yet. Bear with me. will get back onto a sensible timeline soon.

Most important news is I'm still in love. A year this new year. Long time since anyone tolerated me that long. What to say. She's very pretty, especially her bottom. Has a three year old whose an angel (except at 3 am or mealtimes, when she's possessed of the devil). Want to talk all about them but that's a bit of an intrusion so I will skirt around that bit of my life. Except to say I'm very happy. And sometimes I just wont be able to restrain myself. Bear with me.

So apart from the remarkable fact that this confirmed bachelor & old person has found a young and beautiful hottie? what else? Oh lots and lots. But not copenhagen. Unless I'm back from a killing spree and my rage has not abated.

2010. Feel its going to be a good year.